Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I want a musical about memes.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
