Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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