in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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