I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
