I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
