I want to have your abortion
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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