do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
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its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
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I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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