The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
