I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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