This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
