Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
