But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
