This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize