dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
