1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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