Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
