she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize