I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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