If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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