Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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