i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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