Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
this is an emotional support booty call
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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