This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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