hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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