So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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