Moan for me like Helen Keller
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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