I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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