Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
