Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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