You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
