whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize