it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
