Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
