Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
