sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
