the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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