so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize