Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
