Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
God, you're like boner-b-gone
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
