She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
