I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
we should paint friendship bongs
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize