Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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