so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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