im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
