Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Randomize
