YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
