Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Never underestimate the power of titties
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
