He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
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Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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