they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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