if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
